The Dakota Johnson–Ellen DeGeneres Intrigue Deepens

Dakota Johnson and Ellen DeGeneres. Photo: Getty Images As if we needed more emotional turmoil coming out of the holiday weekend, this story about Ellen DeGeneres not attending Dakota Johnson’s 30th birthday party now potentially involves a certain former neocon president.

“I was invited? Why didn’t I go?” asked DeGeneres, nonplussed. The camera then panned to one of the show’s producers, who informed her, “You were out of town,” and DeGeneres bantered right back, “Oh yeah, I had a thing.” Johnson was almost out of the woods — but then she referred to Tig Notaro, who performed at her birthday party, as her favorite comedian, which DeGeneres seemed to take as a personal slight. The video of the polite altercation quickly went viral.

This is the content I come to twitter for

nobody cares

Ellen is insane. Good for Dakota.

And trump. And how the oscars are too white. Don’t forget climate denial.

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Ellen DeGeneres Skipped Dakota Johnson’s Birthday Party to Watch Football With George W. Bush, Who Had People Tortured“It was probably in Malibu—that’s too far for me to go to,” said Ellen, who instead traveled that weekend to Dallas, Texas, to attend a football game with the man responsible for Abu Ghraib. Lollll. Thank you for reporting on this. Everyone who did anything with Obama now personally involved with drone strikes. Thanks.
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