Area Woman Will Have To Be Way More Fucking Pregnant Than That If She Wants To Be Offered Subway Seat

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NEW YORK—Explaining how she was “barely showing,” local man Kevin Martin told reporters Tuesday that the woman who just got on his subway car will have to be way more fucking pregnant than that if she wants to be offered his seat. “There’s no way I’m standing up and moving for someone who looks like they just got knocked up yesterday,” said Martin of the woman who was eight months pregnant, adding that if she was expecting someone to surrender the comfort of their chair just because she was having a contraction here and there, she was out of her goddamn mind. “What is that thing? Seven or eight pounds? Yeah, sorry lady, but you’d better be ready to pop if you want me to give up this spot that I pushed my way into the train to get. Unless you’re on your way to the hospital, you gotta stand just like everyone else.” At press time, Martin commented that there was “no way in hell” that he was giving up a seat for a blind man who clearly had two eyes.

 

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Reminds me of when I was riding a crowded bus in San Francisco, and all of us moved to give a pregnant woman a seat. She boarded, glared at us, and said, “I’m not pregnant.” The turned her friend and said, “It’s the shirt.” truestory

When they give me that whimpery eye, I tell them 'I do not support people bringing more children into this world.'

I lived in NY for a time, and whenever I courteously offer my seat to a pregnant mother, a mother with an infant or an elderly, I was looked upon as if I was insane. Such cultural behaviors, on those subways, are something to observe.🤔

With the amount of homeless that masturbate on the subway; sitting down is probably what got her pregnant.

Subway sandwiches have never recovered from the Fogle incident.For the readers at home, Jared Fogle was a spokesman for the chain.He was fat and was a child predator but they hired him anyway. When I think of Subway, I think of promises unkept,a sea of potential never to be seen

Hahahahaha

😆

Maybe she can sit on someone’s lap. Oh wait. That’s what got her this way to begin with.

equality

If there was no F word it would be funnier.

How dare they disrespect the great NikkiGlaser like this.

Maybe he shouldn’t have changed the admin rules.

Sitting is the new smoking, think of the child!

Congrats NikkiGlaser!

At press time, Martin commented that there was “no way in hell” that he was giving up a seat for a blind man who clearly had two eyes. 🤣

Don't want any possible headlines of 'Local Man Chastised after thinking chubby women is 4-5 months pregnant.' That going through that again.

let‘s not forget the funniest & the most original comment 'she should have slept with someone with a car'

This was me - heavily pregnant and commuting daily on the NYC subway. The only people who offered up their seats were women and the elderly!

what a rude post..

Unbelievable how she thought she could come aboard and take up extra space

And throw down a fiver area commuter screams.

IANfidance immediately thought of you for some reason when I saw this

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