BoboDoobee I'm laughing so hard...
Where do they think of this shit xD
Satire aside, sexual abuse is everywhere. If you think it only happens in other groups and can’t happen in your group you’re part of the problem.
Let’s hope they don’t merge and create a boynopoly.
LaurenRaeee
A lot of people don't know that the boy scouts are a religious organization that discriminates against gays and Atheists.
👎
Pikers!
The last thing from the Onion I’ll ever read...
Oh no.... 😂😂😂😂
'At press time, the Catholic Church had offered to send a few dozen priests to the Boy Scouts of America to show them how it’s done.'
Well, to be honest, the Catholic Church kinda has a head start by 1000+ years.
maxmccluskey21
Mafiadon has mafiaputin to play with
So the Pope's not going to fix his church and get rid of all those pedifile priests? Well mr. Pope, an glad I'm not catholic, your not the kind of pope you should be. And what's this about secret satanic rituals you and the cardinals are doing? You know mr pope your doomed.
Da_Coolman ☠️☠️☠️
Both institutions had to learn the hard way, don't allow homosexuals near kids.
Awesome!
for every one scout who claims he was abused there will be 25 who learned from scouting and was saved from the wrong road by scouting, of course we need to focus on the few rather than the whole, sounds like a Sanders or Warren speach
Amen 🙏
The catholic church deserves all the ridicule it can get.
It baffles me that Catholics don't storm the Vatican with pitchforks and torches. I don't understand how anyone could be okay with the Catholic Church's handling of the predators among its clergy.
It's very likely that most of those molesters were GOOD Christians who went to church every Sunday.
Boy Scouts just filed for bankruptcy.
I concur!
You forgot Hollywood ‼️‼️‼️‼️
fffffffuck
LawrenceMeals
Always said it has to suck being an altar boy and in the scouts.
joerogan
Best believe theee hardest Vatican City goons are coming after ya bud.
DomRocco
World's Uncle's: Hold our beer
maybe they should just join forces and molest each other.
Seriously. It's time to cut the Catholic parishioners some slack. It is a wonderful religion filled with amazing Christians. Mocking them just has the side effect of lowering all belief not just for Catholics
BOY SCOUTS IN TROUBLE BANKRUPCY DECLARED SO MUCH FOR THEIR MOTTO “ALWAYS BE PREPARED”
When did the Onion start serious journalism?
HoodlumRIP Truth in thy dark humour
Well done Onion. Well done
RealKaylaJames Baptists are rallying tho
Hmm, it really does make you think now doesn't it.
HoodlumRIP
Pope Francis speaks Frankly.
Omg 😂
RealNews
Oof.
I'm team Boy Scouts. GO BS!!
'Damnit, We're Still Number One........and We are NOT Going to Take This Lying Down.'
Damn Onion!
No chance. Plus they had a thousand or so year head start
Good one 🤣😂😅
A new kind of crime war
Bruh..I died reading this.
Not funny; just true
This is a BRUTAL. Well done.
Oh my god lmaooo
It's like the Axis of Just As Evil.
I think the Bou Scouts have a lot of catching up Catholic Church.
I'm imagining there might be crossover between the two. Who gets the credit then?
Who likes boys more? The Pope of the head Scout Master?
Republican senators also looking for ways to up their numbers.
Even extreme satire has its NOT FUNNY moments.👎🏻
The CC has been doing it for hundreds of years! By comparison, the BS are children! ...wait
AbeOps prabaresh You guys saw this right? ;-p
Hilarious
I thought they were keeping them in the secret basement in the Vatican Church
Oh Holy See. The topic does not offend me, but the profanity does. You kiss your mother with that mouth?
😂😂😂😂
Again, the press conference part was amazong ❤
No competition!!! Absolutely not!!
hjfrutiger
Or Boys & Girls Clubs
There's Strength In Numbers!
An extra 20 spot in the collection plate this Sunday will reap a list of known pedophile priests in your area. Hey this is a list of available boys and girls club members!
Here, Here... Onion mystic... We hail you for your insightfulness...
Maybe I'll come back later.
Now that's a contest I did not anticipate
divisive
Reminds me of Lakers vs Clippers
snopes please fact check
*happens to be both Catholic and a (now grown up) Boy Scout* It's going to be 'one of those days' for me, I reckon... Welp, might as well search for the related news stories and get it over with.😓
Ohio State was challenging the leaders, but now that Jim_Jordan isn’t around, they’re numbers are on the decline
No surprises here, on the daily score card. The Boy Scouts Motto is “Be Prepared!”
He reminds me so much of Jorge Borges....without the Jorge Borges.
not the the summum bonum!
The Church should also worry about competition from Jeffrey Epstein. 😄
The church has nothing to fear to be honest
They better hurry up bcuz the Boy Scouts are giving them a run for their money.
They would call in their star closer, But Jeffrey Epstien has incarcerated. Guess they'll have to go with second string Donald J. Trump, you're up! Breaking News: Evangelicals join the Catholic Church enmasse! Breaking-BREAKING NEWS!: Atheism reaches all-time high in America
Have u seen this man?
I don't think they have anything to worry about there.
Maybe... but blasphemy? That crosses a line
As a former scout this hits close to home
once again... this is real
🔪🔪
They have at least 1500 years on them.
Ha!
yes
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