Even though you "know" better, these patterns automatically become triggered.Changing the cycle requires new learning and effort.
The intergenerational transmission of marital conflict occurs largely because of what psychologist Albert Bandura termed social learning. Social In Bandura’s famous Bobo doll study, children watched an adult act aggressively or non-aggressively toward a doll, the “Bobo Doll.” Children who observedtoward the doll were more likely to imitate aggression than the children who were not exposed to the aggressive modeling. This is the idea of observational learning.
If this describes you, there is a way to stop the cycle and help future generations of your family. Neuroplasticity, the brain’s capacity to grow in the face of new experiences, means with effort, you can change this pattern. Here are four ways to start:If you find yourself having ugly arguments with your partner that impact your kids, you probably feel guilty, ashamed, and helpless. Perhaps you vow to change, and then, once again, the pattern returns.
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