Rich, flavoursome and cooked to perfection, the shepherd’s pie my friend had made for me was melt-in-the-mouth delicious.
I can’t recall a single instance in our long-term friendship where she has ever paid me a compliment, offered congratulations or just indulged me in a bit of confidence-boosting cheerleading. Perhaps this makes me sound needy, that I seek out validation from my friends and must be the centre of attention.
I shouldn’t have allowed her behaviour to affect me, but I felt crushed. I wanted to say to her that my success did not mean there was less to go around, that me achieving something did not mean that she couldn’t. Why do women behave this way? The answer is rooted in an observation my late mother used to make whenever I complained about such situations. ‘Angie,’ she would tell me, ‘it’s harder to be a friend in the good times than it is in the bad times.’