‘Immaculate’: Sydney Sweeney’s Catholic Horror Movie is Pure Nunsense

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The 'Euphoria' star hits every station of the grindhouse cross in this ridiculous take on religious horror. Just be sure to stick around for the end.

. You’ve likely heard about the last 10 minutes, even if you don’t know the plot surprises and spoilers regarding the who, what and why of it all. We’ll simply direct you to the photo above, in which our blood-smeared Lady of Perpetual Screamitude aims for the highest-decibel mark. By this point, Sweeney’s character — a chaste young American woman living at an Italian convent — has been to hell and back. She’s got one last task to perform.

Sweeney’s Sister Cecilia has found her calling thanks to an accident on an icy lake back in Michigan, and she’s convinced she was saved because the Lord has some special purpose for her. Her belief that she must get thee to a nunnery ASAP is steadfast. Our faith that she will be safe from harm is tempered somewhat by the film’s opening, however, in which we see a young woman attempt to escape the clutches of some evil looking Mother Superior-types and ends up being buried alive.

Then, after one particularly intense nightmare involving confessional booths, endless hallways and grasping hands, Cecilia goes to the infirmary. She’s called into the Mother Superior’s office, where Father Sal and several other authorities want to speak to her. Has she been with a man, they inquire, either before or since coming to the convent? Of course not, Cecilia replies. Because, they tell her, you’re currently with child. It is a blessed miracle.

Once Sister Cecilia gets the good news regarding her sexless conception and becomes both the object of worship and envy , the film tips more toward the Polanski-esque, withbeing a key influence …though not in the way you might think. Again, we don’t want to say too much, though we will note that there’s one whopper of an explanation that will very likely have you screaming “Holy Shit!”, and not necessarily in a good way.

The only thing this second-rate scarefest truly succeeds in doing, however, is giving Sweeney a hell of a showcase. It’s already become part of the film’s backstory that Sweeney auditioned for this role a decade ago, the project was then consigned to purgatory, and the newly empowered star revived it and signed on as a producer. She knows a good Final Nun part when she reads one, and likely saw the chance to widen her range and/or open up an avenue into over-the-top genre movies.

 

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