. These aren’t just the perfect list of words for meditative chanting, but rather the top porn search terms typed stickily in by millennials, according to Pornhub. Viewed beside the next top five terms—the data-69 they did with Pornhub as to better understand how the kids rub one out these days. Not surprisingly, those now aged 18 to 34 comprise about 60 percent of Pornhub’s viewers, while the other 40 percent are dead as far as we care.
Millennials reach the promise land of orgasm one minute and five seconds sooner than older generations, who, it’s safe to say, just need some time, okay? Some 60 percent of Millennials watch porn on their phones rather than a laptop or desktop, which makes perfect sense because a phone is the easiest thing to hurl across the room in disgust the moment after you have an orgasm and can’t believe what you were just looking at. You know what I always say: Shame-based avoidance and/or disgust is the mother of invention.