Celebrities Give Kate Middleton Photoshop Advice

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A digitally manipulated family photo, intending to show off the healthiness of the Princes of Wales after a recent abdominal surgery, caused an uproar, speculation, and conspiracy theories. The Onion asked celebrities to give photoshop advice to Kate Middleton, and this is what they said.

Kim Kardashian “You can get a 60% Adobe discount if you’re a student. That’s mostly the reason I went to law school.” Joni Mitchell “I’ve found that developing a once-in-a-generation talent at melody and lyricism has helped a few people not think about my appearance at all and instead just see me as a talented human being. So I’d recommend she try that.

” Adam Levine “They can airbrush tattoos on if you’re too scared to get one but already told your buddies you did.” Prince Harry “Snapchat has some pretty realistic-looking dog ear filters.” Martin Scorsese “If she’s interested in looking like a 24-year-old Irish truck driver, I have some groundbreaking anti-aging technology that doesn’t quite do the trick.” Anne Hathaway “Eyes big. Make the eyes big. Big eyes. As big as eyes can be. And if you think the eyes are too big? Make them bigger.

 

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