I once searched on YouTube ‘how to look Korean’. And that's so embarrassing to write. Because not only does it disregard everything about who I am as a brown person, but it fetishises an entire ethnicity. But when I was 14 years old, I didn’t even stop to question it. I was simply conducting research on how to be a ‘better version’ of myself. In 2014, around when I was 13, I fell in love with K-pop .
I thought, one day I’d get there. One day I could become the person I wanted to be. But as the years passed by, and I went to concerts, bought makeup, albums, and the K-fashion, I was never really satisfied when I caught glimpses of myself in the mirror. There wasn’t a specific moment in my life where I had noticed that my interest in Korean beauty standards had become self-destructive.
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