NORILSK, RUSSIA—In response to complaints of skyrocketing ticket prices caused by excessive fees, live-entertainment monolith Ticketmaster has opened a new workhouse where Taylor Swift fans can labor to earn tickets for her forthcoming Eras Tour, sources within the music industry confirmed Friday.
“Whenever I feel like killing myself to end my miserable existence in the Ticketmaster gulag, I escape in my mind to the moment when I’ll finally see Taylor, and that keeps me going,” said emaciated Taylor Swift fan Emma Harrigan, whose hands were bleeding as she began another day of indentured servitude in the hopes that, many years from now, her hard labor would be redeemable for a single ticket to one of the pop idol’s stadium shows.
😭
Feel like their labor would be better applied towards writing her lyrics so she could finally sing about something other than her exes.
And after ten years one of them will finally get their ticket for a 2022 show.
Locations please!!
Not worth it- I lost my left arm from the elbow down in an accident when I worked in one of these factories welding Lady Gaga tickets.
...but they'll have to pay a $52 a day 'facility fee' if they work on site, or a $78 'convenience fee' if they opt for the toil-from-home option.
I would do it for Taylor
kellykeegs