Unsettling Study Finds Second Cousins Technically Fair Game

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BOSTON—Providing new and disconcerting insights into long-speculated risks of human mating, a Boston University Medical College genetic study published last week in Nature Genetics found that, despite the longstanding cultural and social stigma of the pairing, second cousins are, in fact, technically fair game. “Our findings clearly, if unfortunately, show that despite the perceived close familial bonds, sufficient genetic variation exists in second cousins to make them suitable mates,” the study read in part, further stating that while such a relationship might make some or all members of your family uncomfortable, speaking from a purely scientific standpoint, that shouldn’t stop you. “Although, it’s not exactly ideal, like being with someone much more distantly related to you, or ideally being with someone who is absolutely no relation at all, it does appear that second cousins are, for lack of a better term, allowed. Certainly a taboo against the second cousin pairing still exists in our culture, and there is significant interest in conducting an unsettling follow-up study to investigate the possibility that the coupling’s transgressive nature might actually make it, colloquially speaking, even hotter.” In a highlighted footnote, the study specifically emphasized that siblings and parents are never under any circumstances “up for grabs.”

BOSTON—Providing new and disconcerting insights into long-speculated risks of human mating, a Boston University Medical College genetic study published last week infound that, despite the longstanding cultural and social stigma of the pairing, second cousins are, in fact, technically fair game.

“Our findings clearly, if unfortunately, show that despite the perceived close familial bonds, sufficient genetic variation exists in second cousins to make them suitable mates,” the study read in part, further stating that while such a relationship might make some or all members of your family uncomfortable, speaking from a purely scientific standpoint, that shouldn’t stop you.

 

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Oh thank gog

In parts of NYC sisters are OK. Doubt it? Go look at the dwarfism you can observe. 35% of the residents of certain areas are avg. 4 ft tall, especially those born during WWII; it facilitated draft evasion on the part of the ignorant family members. Really. A neighborhood o morons

Sure now that they are all married do you tell me this!

Was the study funded by the house of Habsburg-Lothringen?

Now I know why my sister is so pissed at me.

Awww man...

Yeah. We already knew that. 😂

*Alabama Intensifies

It's worked for the DuPont family for a generation or two...

Cringing but irrefutable data.

Where do I find sexy single second cousins in my area? Asking for a friend.

🤢🤮

Technically, any family member is fair game if you have no shame.

Not the worst u've posted

not unsettling at all. jasmine is pretty hot

. Einstein married his first cousin because he couldnt take care of himself. As far as I know, Ive not dated any cousins

Nice!

I’ll inform Jared and Ivanka of the good news!

beckbrand123 joking aside, i'm pretty sure inter-cousin relations is only a taboo in the west.

Yikes

Study done by creepy older cousins

Love knows no stigma. My Mom and Dad are siblings. They met in the womb and have been together ever since. Who hear doesn't what a love like that?

This is the media I am here for! 🙏🔥🌈🍅🥃🍭❤️❤️

You're sick

Too close to home, man.

W

Unsettling. But not illegal, right? Asking for a cousin.

Look, it's not our fault that they come over to our house and use the pool and leave the bathroom door ajar when changing our of their swimsuit when they know DAMN WELL our room is right next to it!

True

Jesus Christ... 😂😂😂😂

we been knew

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